Genesis 23: How Saved person grieves

As we saw in the last chapter, Abraham come through a tough test. One that many feel was his biggest faith moment but as painful as that was, now we see he faces an even more significant challenge in my eyes. Oh no, don’t get me wrong, loss of a child is devastating, and there is no doubt about it but here Abraham says goodbye to his spouse. Although I have not experienced either scenario by God’s grace but if you have, it is not my intention to undermine your loss. When you lose your spouse, it takes away that one person who can console you, one you can talk to. One you can cry in front of, share your fears & joy and when that person is taken away from you, that must have been devastating. As we read this chapter, God teaches us through Abraham how one should deal with such loss. How, we as Christian should grieve. Let’s look at it together and I hope all of us who have lost someone or undoubtedly will, find encouragement from this portion of scripture.
Sarah lived to be a hundred and twenty-seven years old. ² She died at Kiriath Arba (that is, Hebron) in the land of Canaan, and Abraham went to mourn for Sarah and to weep over her.

Sarah is the only woman whose age is mentioned in the Bible. She dies in Hebron and it is important to note the place.HEBRON means fellowship. At the end of her life, she was in the felloship with both her husband & Lord. Yes, they faced many challenges in married life, but at the end, they were in fellowship. Sarah who laughed at the notion of being a mother at old age grew into kind of woman every Christian wife should be according to 1 Peter 3:5-6. This is the first mention of weeping in the Bible. God waited till now to introduce the concept. There were no tears shed at the death of Abel, there was no crying at time of Noah and destruction of the world, but it happens when the father of faith is separated from his beloved wife. In our society up until recently, man did not cry or show emotion, but here we see Abraham mourned and wept for his wife. As Christian there is nothing wrong with mourning or weeping for loved one but as Paul tells us in book of Thessalonians 4:13 ¹³ Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. We have an eternal hope in Christ. Life only makes sense in the frame of eternity. Those of us who are saved, we are just moving on to the glory of God.
³ Then Abraham rose from beside his dead wife and spoke to the Hittites.^[a] He said, ⁴ “I am a foreigner and stranger among you. Sell me some property for a burial site here so I can bury my dead.”

After he mourns for Sarah, he comes to a realization that “This world is not his home”. When a loved one passes on, suddenly things become clearer. We stop and think about life, what we think of as theology or Sunday church talks, suddenly becomes very real and powerful. We all take a pause and contemplate that dreaded what if question. We as born-again Christian should know exactly where we are headed. Our stay here on earth is temporary and one where we should be gathering our treasures in heaven. In the parable of a rich man, Jesus says Gather up your treasure in heaven as where your treasure is there your heart will be. How do you transfer your treasure to heaven? continue to focus on things of above, and each time you walk as the spirit leads you, you are transferring your treasure in heaven. In small steps you will become heavenly minded and just as Abraham you will also realize that you are just a stranger & sojourner on this earth. If a loved one is saved, their passing on is an important process of spiritual development. Now your treasure ( family, spouse) is in heaven received and your heart yearns for that reunion. Oh, what a wonderful hope we have in Jesus that we will be resurrected and we will see our loved one in full glory. Abraham is standing in the middle of his property, it does not mean anything to him as he asked for burying-place for Sarah and when he passed, the grave is the only thing he owned in the promised land. Oh, how we need to learn from Abraham, we continue to toil to build up our 401k, our property, bank balance and inheritance for children but when it is time to move on, it is the empty grave of Jesus is all we can pin our hope on. Abraham also did not want to build a shrine for Sarah. He wanted to give her proper burial and bury her out of his sight. Once he buried her, he wanted to continue in his pilgrimage and live in faith for rest of his life. This does not mean that we forget about our loved one. It just means that it would not make our loved one happy if we continue to live in perpetual mourning, but living rest of our life serving Lord till we cross the finish line in victory. We do a disservice to those who are gone ahead of us if we do not sprint to finish line like Abraham.
⁵ The Hittites replied to Abraham, ⁶ “Sir, listen to us. You are a mighty prince among us. Bury your dead in the choicest of our tombs. None of us will refuse you his tomb for burying your dead.”.

As you can see Abraham had a significant impact on the people around him. Although he lived a simple life in a tent as a shepherd, people noticed his faith and his love for His GOD. In contrast, if you remember Lot’s faith made no impression on people around him. Does your faith make an impression on those around you? Your family? Spouse? Coworkers? Our faith must be strong enough that those around us should come to know Jesus through our lives. The strongest testimony anyone can give is the daily living which preaches Jesus. That kind of life brings more people to Christ than any sermons or church. In John 13:34-35 Jesus says “³⁴ A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. ³⁵ By this, all men will know that you are My disciples if you have a love for one another.” Don’t let your faith be lukewarm. You don’t have to shout out your faith or hit people over the head with your faith. Let them see Jesus in you. The way you talk, the way you react, the way you conduct yourself should reflect the grace you have received . Here the sons of Hittites give a great compliment to Abraham on his faith.
⁷ Then Abraham rose and bowed down before the people of the land, the Hittites. ⁸ He said to them, “If you are willing to let me bury my dead, then listen to me and intercede with Ephron the son of Zohar on my behalf ⁹ so he will sell me the cave of Machpelah, which belongs to him and is at the end of his field. Ask him to sell it to me for the full price as a burial site among you.”

“Machpelah” means double door. He did not want one of the fancy tomb with carved images as it was a custom in those days, but rather he picked a tomb that had 2 doors. A way in and way out. Those of us who are born again have glorious promise. Our last breath here on earth is our first breath in heaven. As Paul put it “To be absent in the body is to be in presence with God, We are just passing through.
¹⁰ Ephron the Hittite was sitting among his people and he replied to Abraham in the hearing of all the Hittites who had come to the gate of his city. ¹¹ “No, my lord,” he said. “Listen to me; I give^[b] you the field, and I give^[c] you the cave that is in it. I give^[d] it to you in the presence of my people. Bury your dead.”¹² Again Abraham bowed down before the people of the land ¹³ and he said to Ephron in their hearing, “Listen to me, if you will. I will pay the price of the field. Accept it from me so I can bury my dead there.”¹⁴ Ephron answered Abraham, ¹⁵ “Listen to me, my lord; the land is worth four hundred shekels^[e] of silver, but what is that between you and me? Bury your dead.”

Those who are familiar with bargaining know that Ephron was not generous and giving the tomb away. He was just starting to negotiate by saying : I GIVE IT TO YOU”. 400 Shekels was not an accurate price of the land & grave. It was meant to be the starting point for negotiation.
¹⁶ Abraham agreed to Ephron’s terms and weighed out for him the price he had named in the hearing of the Hittites: four hundred shekels of silver, according to the weight current among the merchants.

Abraham did not even bother bargaining. He paid the full price. Here was a man who back in chapter 14 did not accept spoils of war from king of Sodom. He was not going to haggle over the price of a tomb. Don’t try to buy what world has to sell. Jesus has paid the price for us. He gives us the peace that passes all understanding. There is no need to negotiate for salvation. It is simple to just accept Christ and you have bought the 2 door tomb. Like Sarah. You will just pass through. Believe, confess and make Christ your savior today.
¹⁷ So Ephron’s field in Machpelah near Mamre—both the field and the cave in it, and all the trees within the borders of the field—was deeded ¹⁸ to Abraham as his property in the presence of all the Hittites who had come to the gate of the city. ¹⁹ Afterward, Abraham buried his wife Sarah in the cave in the field of Machpelah near Mamre (which is at Hebron) in the land of Canaan. ²⁰ So the field and the cave in it were deeded to Abraham by the Hittites as a burial site.

As Abraham buried his wife, he was fully aware that Sarah has moved on to eternity. I am so glad that we have eternal life in Jesus. I do not know how people who do not have Jesus face death. We are just strangers in this land. If you feel out-of-place and like a visitor on this world, rejoice your home is elsewhere. If there is no other reason to accept Jesus and be saved, promise of eternity is reason enough. Has your loved one passed on? Are you dealing with loss? As difficult as it may seem, you must move on and live a life of Victory. Sprint to the finish line. As Paul says in Hebrews 12, Keep your eyes on Jesus, author & perfecter of our faith, do not grow weary and lose heart. I like to close with words from famous song.
First Verse
There’s a light in the window
And the table’s set in splendor
Someone’s standing by the open door
I can see a crystal river
Oh I must be near forever
And I’ve never been this homesick before

Chorus
See the bright light shine
It’s just about home time
I can see my Father standing at the door
This world has been a wilderness
I’m ready for deliverance
Lord, I’ve never been this homesick before

Second Verse
I can see the family gather
Sweet faces, there all familiar
But no one’s old or feeble anymore
Oh this lonesome heart is cryin’
Think I’ll spread my wings for flyin’
Lord, I’ve never been this homesick before

Our home is in heaven and father is waiting to embrace us. I am ready to go home. ARE YOU? if the answer is anything but yes, it is time to accept Jesus. May God bless us all. Amen